YOUTH TASK FORCE MEMBER

I will be 26 soon. Probably 26 and single too, which sounds super awesome and sexy to me. Getting old is a lot of women’s worst nightmare, but I happen to like aging a lot. How else could I have become this amazing and awesome person? Haha, just kidding.

Around New Year’s, people always ask you how your last year was. Do you remember what you said? Believe it or not, I have said the same thing every year: It was the best year of my life. That is true. Looking back on my life, it is amazing (so amazing it is almost spiritual) how much I have learned and how much bigger my world has gotten within the space of one year. I am a much, much better person and lover than a year ago. I have so, so much more to offer to my lover and friends than a year ago. If the 20-year-old me breaks up with a boyfriend, she probably hides at home for three days crying, or grabs a bunch of meaningless sex to rebound. The 25-year-old me would turn that experience into a play, get it produced and shown, warming the heart of everyone who sees it. BTW, I would have been such a prolific playwright if I have started doing that since I was twenty.

Here are a few things I have learned being 25 going on 26:

The other day I ran into an interesting blog post titled "Too young? Sex-ed for children in first grade" on a blog called "China Smack". Apparently someone saw a sex-ed book in a first grader's schoolbag on human sexuality and didn't think it was quite appropriate. The blog post sums it up: "The cartoon-like illustration coupled by the straightforwardness of its content brings to question the suitableness of sex education at such an early age." This someone then scanned a few cartoon illustrations of the book. You can see them if you follow the link.

The "straightforward" talk touches on how men's and women's bodies are built differently, proper names for human genitalia and how to identify and avoid a pedophile. The discussion on the blog then proceeds to question whether the info provided is too early for a seven year old. It makes a rewarding and amusing read. Some say it's too early for a 7-year-old to get such a close-up look at a vagina (probably because they haven't even seen one that close at the age of 34). Some say you can never give this kind of knowledge too early to a kid by referencing their experience exploring their own bodies at age seven. You should always know what you are playing with. Very reasonable argument. Point taken.

Don't mess with us Asians, or we will breed. - Russell Peters

Are men all the same? This is from Seinfeld the comic: "All the tuxedos look the same, don't they? I guess the idea came from women who think: men are all the same. We might as well dress them the same." But I've got news for you girls out there: men can be very different.

I had two interesting conversations the other day with two guys. One guy I talked to said the first time he had sex with his girlfriend, it was without any contraception. "I didn't have a condom, neither did she," he said, "I promised her that I was going to pull out. She looked at me and nodded. At that moment she looked extremely vulnerable and I found that very attractive. She trusted me. No one has ever trusted me that much before. I was very much moved."

“But it is not something you have any control over. It is not about trusting you. It’s a bodily function. ” I said. “Right,” he laughed and agreed. “It’s like trusting someone with a cold to not sneeze. I wouldn’t trust me if I were her.”

So, yes, we Asians do have sex. A lot. Maybe we don't talk about it or show it on TV that often, which is not necessarily an advantage for the kids who want to learn about it. The word "sex education" is a new word to the Chinese vocabulary, added sometime in this current century. Before that, it was "sex or education", which means you either spend your time thinking about having sex, or you spend your time working hard in school so you have a chance at getting a higher education.

So it didn't come as a shock when I learned that only 36% of young people surveyed in Asia Pacific felt well informed about contraception. This is because sex education still barely exists in Chinese schools. In fact, the curriculum is so packed with preparations for exams that anything that won't appear on college entrance exam papers doesn't have a chance of occupying even one minute of a student's time.

A while ago I tried speed dating for one episode of Sexy Beijing.
Speed dating is very popular in Beijing because...well, its speedy. In a city as fast moving as Beijing, people want things as fast as possible. Instant coffees are popular. We have at least 100 kinds of instant noodles. Making people wait is considered a crime. So naturally when they had a chance to skip the waiting around for dates, they jump at it.

The secret to speed dating is that you need a good screening system. You get only 6 minutes to talk to each person, and then make a decision. Brutal? Yes. But not as brutal as getting rejected after the third date.